Tag: Mind and Body

Me Too Am Speaking

Frederica R. Burrage

COCOA BUTTER MASK

I move with pride                    even though I hide                      the pain inside-                            I speak of shame                      not to defame                                or place blame-                        the embarrassment              was a detriment                          to my temperament-                    I didn’t choose to be a part of any movement or hash tag-      especially if the requirement meant that I’d be privy to sexual molestation-                It is with hesitation                that I proclaim            victimization-                    This is sad…                                  However, my aim                  is to lose the humiliation            that I hold inside-                        The resentment survivors carry, can vary                      from fear to anxiety-                  from depression to grief.            By standing up against abuse,  it’s a slight relief-                      Do I regret speaking up about the who touched me              that night? No-                              At the time (age 10),                    I lied and stated that                nothing was wrong                      but I cried-                            What made me think            that I could be strong enough    to say something,                      to tell my truth-                            When I did                                    I was not believed-                      It was not a reprieve                  It was a game-                              The only thing I achieved was  the name of  a liar.                      Him, he became the victim-      I tried to tell                                  that I was playing in Hell            with the devil                        with a grin-                                    He actually smiled at me            ever so gingerly                      like he was protected-                I felt neglected                          My family                                    did not help me                        My feelings were rejected-        I did not receive a hug,              a kiss or a pat                            on the forehead.                          I got yelled at instead-                Usually my mother                      coated our ills            with Cocoa Butter…                      it was better than pill-          This time, she seemed torn, confused, removed, worn.        I had nobody-                          My scars were infested              by sores                                      My skin bled with spores            of contempt.                                  I was used-                                    Even though                          years have gone by,                      therapy does not conceal            the harmful memories-                                                                        Prayer and meditation helps    to heal the clutter of emotions.  Forgiveness is key-                      I am writing my truth                to liberate me from hate.            Holding such rage in                  is not healthy-                              I pray that I can          shed some anger            towards this dead man.              I will forgive him one day-        My bruises are mine.                  Other people have died              trying to hide much pain.          I say ENOUGH!

My testament is to inspire,      to empower other people          to come forward.                        SPEAK UP!                          DON’T BE AFRAID!                      Seek assistance and put a stop  to this violent crime          before it repeats-                      It’s time to SUPPORT            each other-                                    LISTEN to one another              and mend scars                      that don’t fade-                          Let perpetrators know                their mistreatment won’t be tolerated and they will be punished!

#MeToo     #AmSpeaking            #Itriedtotell     #MyTruth

Reduce the fear                          of double victimization              by giving an objective ear        to someone in need.

When the Giver Needs Care

Frederica R. Burrage

You can’t help anyone, if you need help. CARE FOR YOURSELF!

Being a caregiver requires a great deal of responsibility and patience. It can be stressful and time consuming. While focusing a lot of attention on someone else, it would be wise to be cognizant of your own wellbeing. What good are you to anyone, if you are not emotionally okay?

It is not selfish to put yourself first. If you need help, ask for it. You will do more harm to everyone if you try to please others when you are not in optimal health. Don’t try to be a superhero and prove your strength. The many challenges you face, can take its toll in the long run. Having a reliable support system will benefit you and your patient(s).

It takes a special person to become a caregiver (even to family members). Usually people get paid to assist with strangers though. Choosing such an undertaking, can be both physically and mentally exhausting. When it all seems overwhelming, it is best to pause and reconsider one’s effectiveness. There is no shame in trying and then throwing in the towel. Recognize when you’ve had enough. At least you gave it a shot. KNOW YOUR LIMITS.

Once people attempt to honor a commitment, fear can surface, that if they quit, they will have failed. Feelings matter and no one is to blame for expressing themselves respectfully, when the going gets rough. BE CLEAR and CONCISE. Speak your Intentions and don’t sugarcoat any issues.

When you lose sight of your own self care, you cannot possibly give adequate time and affection to others. Don’t feel guilty in taking some time away to pamper yourself once in awhile. NURTURE YOUR WANTS. De-stress and you will bounce back.

We all need to identify our emotions and concentrate on our positive attributes. Sometimes we hit bumps on the road. Then, we regroup and keep moving forward. No one should be expected to give what they don’t have or do the impossible. Just wanting to make a difference, makes a difference. Look for alternatives and resources to combat negative thoughts. Let it be a mission to practice self-love, before you devote a substantial amount of energy elsewhere. If not, you risk “burnout” and may feel like a burden also. Alleviate your strain… LET GO and find other constructive ways to be productive. 20180803_0856173657246972389799107.jpg

Spiritual Wellness

Frederica R. Burrage

Take a break from your hectic schedule and make time for YOU. Sit quietly in a comfortable setting and let go of outside noises. Don’t be tempted to look at or answer to any electronic devices.

We can all benefit from a mental timeout, every now and then. We need to sit still. Sleep is good, but we may only have a few minutes to meditate… to pray. Find reasons to laugh. Cry if you must release tension. Relax. Slow down. Detach from stress. Pause. Breathe deeply. Unwind. Alleviate anxiety and elevate your conciousness.

In order to thrive, we all must focus and devote attention to our own spiritual wellbeing. First, practice good habits and maintain healthy boundaries. Second, remove negative substances and toxic people from your life. Lastly, balance your thoughts, feed your body with nutrients, and do what makes your soul happy. These tools will increase your quality of life, your energy and overall physical health. Your mood will be calmer- allowing you to make rational choices. Your behavior will reflect your positive attitude and your radiant spirit will influence others. Your stamina will increase and help you to move more freely- to enjoy all the things you hope to create or conquer.

Challenge yourself to take care of YOU, first and foremost. YOU matter!